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Syndicated Cynic: Stacks on stacks on stacks

Courtesy Photo
Courtesy Photo

I was reading the Bible once, and you know what? I couldn’t find the verse that tells Christians to become infatuated with monetary gain upon conversion. I tried, guys, and it wasn’t there.

That being said, I’ve heard many sermons that are solely focused on money. Cash. Bills. Stacks.

For reasons unbeknownst to me, the Christian religion, or at least what I’ve seen of it, has largely become a business.

Preachers pray for profit, sermons are centered on salaries and instead of focusing on how to really help others, build relationships and progress as a body, we focus on how to make the next buck.

Can’t you just buy a Dave Ramsey tape?

There’s something to be said for the fact that many churches have to continually tell tithers that the reason they’re giving their earnings to this institution is so that they can, in turn, have monetary blessing.

Shouldn’t we just realize that the church, like any other organization, needs money to operate every once in a while?

Are we so shallow that our only incentive to give to the church is to get something back out of it?

All of this brings a certain verse from the book of Matthew to mind.

Here, Jesus, the guy we’re supposed to be worshipping and listening to, says that it’s really difficult for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven.

I know some people are up for a challenge, but, seriously, go learn to do a cartwheel or something.

It will be really hard to get into heaven when you’re starring on commercials on Fox News because you’re old and rich. I mean, maybe it won’t be hard for you. You’re better than the rest of us anyhow.

Are many American Christians truly afraid of those practicing Islam because they’re one-upping us, paying an extra ten percent in alms?

Do you even know what alms means, or have we, the Christians, ignored the subject because we’re trying too hard to get rich and buy multiple houses, one of which is in California?

Of course, money cannot be ignored completely. Money is needed to get things done.

That’s a simple fact. However, maybe we can wipe the dollar signs off of our eyes and do something like feed the poor.

They’re probably still hungry. I’m not even that poor, and I’m pretty hungry. I guess you should feed me.

Also, there are many Christians that are not focused on money. I meet them sometimes, and it makes me really happy. We should live more simply than we do. We’re selfish. We’re human. It’s sort of gross.

So next time that we say “not of this world” in reference to isolating ourselves from people we don’t like, we should also consider that money is a very human, worldly entity. It shouldn’t be the focus of Christians.

On that note, give me twenty dollaz.

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